Well, as you can see I’ve been keeping busy …

several hundred components

several hundred components

This is called production work, aka how to make a living.  Good thing I love making all these bits, ’cause there’s a whole slew of ’em.  In between making a zillion teeny bits of silver, I’ve been collecting quite a reading list.  I have yet to crack open my September issues – Vogue, W, Bazaar – and then the new W shows up today.  As for before bed reading, I had just gotten started with The Elegance of the Hedgehog when Dave brought home from the library a new Laurie King/Mary Russell mystery (well new to me) The Language of Bees.  It was in the new books section so I’ve got 2 weeks to read it – Hedgehog is on hold, very much enjoying Bees.

Wo, halt, diversion in progress …  This just came up on my Lumenis Pandora station.  Couldn’t find any other way to link to this … Paul Schwarz, Christe Redemptor – really really lovely.

Okay, where was I.  Ah yes,  my mondo reading pile.  I just checked out Primitive and Folk Jewelry from the library.  It’s an out of print Dover publication, all black and white, but it is chock full of really great images.  And the Joan Miro’ books are great jewelry inspiration as well, could be some tattoo ideas in there as well.  Still mulling over what I want for my first tattoo …

ginormous pile o' reading material

ginormous pile o' reading material

And that one other thing –  in all my spare time … and I have no idea why I started thinking about this again but there it is and I was thinking maybe a bit of venting might help loosen it’s grip a bit more …  I was remembering a really unpleasant time in my life and work.  Several years ago, while living in Port Townsend, I had a bunch of old components that I decided to sell to a local person, at the time I thought a friend.  I sold them for pretty cheap.  I figured I could make a bit more selling them than sending them back for scrap.  Anyway, I remember the words coming out of my mouth, “I don’t care what you do with them.”  BIG BIG mistake.  Maybe a year later I realized this person had taken my originals and had them cast.  I hired a lawyer and started that whole thing and then decided it could only get more ugly and decided to let it go.  It’s nagged at me ever since – the feeling of betrayal, the hurt and disbelief.  It’s not that I didn’t pursue the legal nonsense, that was the right decision, but how did I allow that to happen in the first place.  I am a firm believer in the law of attraction – for better or worse, I  either create or allow what transpires in my life.

Several things come to mind.  Mainly – I did not respect my own work.  To let it go with the “I don’t care” caveat reflected a ridiculous cavalier attitude and a high degree of naivete’.  I’ve come a very long way.  Needless to say, I now have a very healthy respect and extremely high regard for my work.  I’ve learned never to discount anything I do; to honor my creations honors me.  I think it all boils down to finally,  really and truly loving myself.  Seems like a no-brainer now, but then … well, that was a different time.

Lesson here, never discount my talent, never disrepect my work and, bottom line,  self love/self respect is the foundation for a life well lived.  Period!

Okay, that’s enough of that.  One more music link.  My other favorite Fever Ray cut…

I’m going to stop working for the evening and get back to my novel.

with deep gratitude and many blessings – kvk

p.s.  tonight’s Yogi tea ‘fortune’ is a keeper – “Delight the world with kindness, grace and compassion.”

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